American National Suicide Prevention Hotline: 1-800-273-8255
Would you like to overcome chronic loneliness by being the healer, nurse and active patient? Chronic loneliness comes from enough repetition of temporary loneliness. One of the best ways to overcome it is to take on the role of healer, nurse and active patient. In other words, you cannot have someone solve your loneliness for you. Active participation by you will be required.
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The main question is what to do about it.
The answer is - Understand what is happening to you and take appropriate actions to deal with it: Click here to call this phone number and Email someone and Write letters and Improve yourself and Chat online with someone and Find a friend and Create a website. and Join a Singles Dating site and Join an online Support Group and Join an Online Forum and Join this website and start a worldwide network of lonely people. or if you wish get professional help .
If you experienced temporary loneliness...
...through your educational years and are now having similar experiences during your first jobs then you have begun your journey into chronic loneliness and it can continue on through a life time.
To understand what is happening to you, you have to examine the internal dialogue that occurs in your mind a) just before you meet people, b) when you meet people and c) after you meet people. Examine all these internal dialogues to understand why you are having difficulty relating to people and why your interactions with people are ending in failure. If you treat each failure as an opportunity to analyze the situation and learn, you can overcome the problem.
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Once you find those reasons...
...take the actions to eliminate those failure-causing thought processes and start your campaign of making more contacts with people. For example you could join a worldwide network of lonely people by following the directions on this page. It is a numbers game - the more people you try to meet, the more hurt you will experience, the more friends you will make and the more chances you will have of finding your way out of your loneliness.
It is worth making the effort...
...because chronic loneliness, besides being a very painful experience, has physical, mental and emotional consequences. Chronic loneliness has a negative effect on your dna, your cells and your immune system. It increases your risk of getting diseases including viral infections, heart disease and cancer.
Chronic illness can contribute to the problem as well. The person is so involved and emotionally overcome with the chronic illness, that the person doesn't have much time for social activity.
Disabled people have to climb an emotional hill before they realize that their disability need not contribute to their loneliness. Once they get aggressive about having as normal a life as possible they are able to make friends.
Chronic loneliness is entrenched amongst wives who have allowed an emotional separation to separate them from their husbands. Everything seems to be normal with their married lives except that the couple does not have an emotional one-to-one relationship with each other. They have stopped caring for each other and have stopped listening to each other's emotions. The husband, quite often, has no clue that anything is wrong! Then, when the lonely wife leaves, the man's chronic and usually fatal loneliness starts.
Some people are ashamed of something in their private lives. This causes them to build a mental and emotional wall against others and that wall interferes in their free communication with other people. Such mental and emotional walls can be what start and maintain their chronic loneliness.
If you have pessimistic tendencies and usually presume others are going to view you negatively or events are going to turn out negatively, then that is what is going to happen for you. If you have feelings of abandonment, rejection, insecurity, unworthiness, sadness, resentment, being different, disliking yourself, or being unlovable then these feelings will negatively affect your attempts to make contact with people.
This is where you have to take on the role of healer and realize that this world is made for do-ers.
Those that are chronically lonely want to receive attention from others. They don't realize that to receive attention from others they have to give reasonable attention first. They have to reach out to others and invite them into their lives. They have to have a heart big enough to do that even if it hurts to do so most of the time! This is where a person has to play the role of the nurse. The nurse helps the person recover from the emotional injuries received in attempts to make contact with others. It hurts less as the person does more and more of it and it is the way back to normalcy.
Chronic loneliness can be felt like a hunger. Just as you have to satisfy your hunger for food, you have to satisfy your hunger for human companionship, otherwise it keeps coming back, stronger every time. When the hunger for human companionship gets very strong it begins to affect your psychological makeup and it affects how you live your life and the thoughts you think. If you are having feelings of abandonment, emptiness, rejection, hopelessness, anger, sadness, frustration or paranoia, you would be doing yourself a favor by contacting a psychotherapist. Psychotherapists consider loneliness an easy problem to solve if the patient co-operates and takes the suggested actions.
Techniques for overcoming chronic loneliness are survival techniques - your survival.
Look inside your mind and ensure you are not turning people away from you.